"I am" - John Clare

This poem is poignant for several reasons; first, it reflects the very real human emotions of despair and longing. The speaker expresses feelings of isolation from the very first line: "I am: yet what I am none cares or knows," and continues to produce a string of forlorn and distressed images. "The nothingness of scorn and noise" shows a distaste for the superficiality and superfluity of life. In that same stanza, however, the speaker dejectedly points out "the vast shipwreck of my life's esteems;" here, we can see that the speaker similarly holds him(or her)self in low regard. The end of the poem expresses a desperate longing for peace; essentially an escape from life. The speaker tells us, "I long... to abide with my Creator, God,/ As I in childhood sweetly slept." This wish for innocence is something we all experience as we grow older; while the speaker may seem hopeful, a person can never return to his childlike state. In this way, we could say that the speaker would be better served by coming to terms with life and finding some worth in it and himself. The persona is interesting and the speaker seems to be working through his feelings when he says "Even the dearest that I love the best,/ Are strange- nay, rather stranger than the rest." This poem is, in a way, in the form of stream of consciousness. The speaker expresses his thoughts and emotions impulsively and irrationally, which indicates that these words do not relay the whole of his sentiments towards life. I find myself in this poem, because there are countless times in my life that I have felt completely dejected and detached- especially growing up. This poem reminds me of the way I used to write in my journal without thinking, just writing what I felt. That kind of emotionally-charged, completely subjective writing was always therapeutic, though certainly not an accurate representation of my thoughts in their totality.